Alltägliches Ringen mit meinem Großen


Ich muss zugeben, im Moment habe ich Phasen in denen ich gern alles hinschmeißen möchte. Mein Großer, Lennon, stellt mich im Moment tagtäglich auf die Probe. Als ob er ausprobieren möchte ob ich es auch ernst meine. Das ist sein Job. Das muss er tun, Grenzen austesten, meine Worttreue prüfen, sein eigenes Reich abstecken und auch mal sagen dürfen: “Mama, bitte lass mich in Ruhe ich möchte jetzt spielen”. Doch das ständige austesten kann auch ganz schön an den Nerven zerren. Ich mache es grundsätzlich gern, mit Überzeugung und Liebe, doch auch einen Job den man liebt darf man mal anstrengend finden…oder nicht?


Lennon wird im Dezember 5 Jahre alt und sein Horizont wird immer weiter. Er fragt mehr detaillierte Fragen, will viel über die Natur und vor allem Tieren wissen. Ich liebe das. Das Fragen und wenn ich es nicht weiss muss ich es rausfinden… Toll, so kann ich auch noch dazulernen. Lennon ist total vernarrt in alles was krabbelt. Von Spinnen, Armeisen, Kellerasseln zu Fröschen, Fischen und größeren Tieren wie Katzen, Hunde und Bauernhoftieren. Wir müssen regelmässig zur Domäne Dahlem um den Kühen, Schweinen und Hühnern Hallo zu sagen. Es ist ihm sehr wichtig. Jeden Tag fängt er ein Krabbeltier und bringt es nach Hause. Er hat mittlerweile immer eine Tupperschale mit, falls er fündig wird. Wie bekommt ihr es hin euren Kindern die Natur nahe zu bringen wenn ihr in einer Stadt wohnt ohne Garten vor der Tür? Je älter die Jungs werden, je mehr Fragen von Lennon kommen, desto mehr wird mir klar das ich möchte das sie viel Natur erleben, fühlen und aufnehmen können. Ich möchte das sie wissen wo Gemüse und Früchte herkommen, wie sie wachsen und wie sie alle heißen. Ich möchte mein kleines Wissen von Pflanzennamen an sie weitergeben und ihnen nahelegen auf die Natur aufzupassen, ein Bewusstsein für unsere Umgebung zu entwickeln.

Doch ich empfinde es als sehr schwer das zu erreichen in der Stadt in einer Etagenwohnung ohne Balkon. Die paar Pflanzen die ich in Töpfen hier in der Wohnung habe machen nun mal keinen Garten wett. Mal sehen was noch wird…

XXX Mama Madola


Riding his bike


my oldest son, Lennon has been nagging me to teach him how to ride his big boys bike. Since we restored my old one, the one I learned how to ride a bike on, he has been trying to sit on it and couldn’t reach the floor yet. We tried again three weeks ago and he could reach the floor. He was over the moon and we went straight ahead with balancing and I showed him to put the pedals just ride to gain momentum and so on.

It didn’t take long, he was very persistent and patient, and he told me to stop helping him, not to hold him and to let go. When did kids become so clever?

wIt literally felt like he was asking me to let go and let him gain more independence, to loosen the string just a little more for him to grow up and become his own self. I let go and felt so proud but also so sad. Proud of my sunshine boy that has now entered the stage of riding a bike, so proud that he went with it, wasn’t scared of it, didn’t need training wheels and learned riding his bike within a week, from first time sitting properly on it to being able to jump on and off by himself and steer his way past pedestrians and other obstacles. And very sad because he is growing up so fast, pushing for independence and learning so fast that I sometimes feel I can’t keep up. He has made a big jump this summer, and the summer isn’t even over yet…

Being a parent must be the only job in the world where being proud, love and sadness lay so close together you experience them all at once.

Mama Madola

Reflection and New Year’s Plans


The year is almost over and I have had some time today to reflect on this year. I was in bed, lucky me has the flu, and I thought about what we have achieved this year and what’s to come.

This year seems to have passed very quickly. One year ago we moved into our apartment in Prenzlauer Berg, Berlin and to this day, I still hate the 95 steps up to our amazing flat. Papa Madola loves his job, is composing amazing sounds and making clients happy by delivering a perfect product almost every time. Lennon has started Kindergarten properly, he is now away from 8am until 11:45 am. And I got to experience some freedom again.
He has grown up so much and as he turned two, two days ago, I realised that we all have grown so much over the last two years. We had a difficult departure from Cape Town, immigrated to a pretty cold but wonderful country and we made a life for ourselves. I think we can pat ourselves on our backs and give each other a high five for getting through it.


Next year will look a little different. Wir haben einpaar Veränderungen vor uns. Ab Mai werden wir voraussichtlich zu viert sein. Lennon will be a big brother by the time June 2014 comes around and we will be a family with a new addition. Besides a new little human, we are planning on moving apartments, not sure where to, but we have our sight set on the flat underneath us. Das wäre ein super entspannter Umzug. Very relaxed move just 10 stairs down. That would be great.
Papa Madola is going to continue his work as a sound engineer and composer and make big clients happy and I will be continuing to be the house- executive 🙂 with all it’s up’s and down’s.

What do you guys have planned for the next year?
Any changes coming your way?

*Hugs and Kisses*

Birthday Madness…

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Lennon turned two yesterday and for some reason I felt I had to throw him a party. We, Lennon, Papa Madola and I, landed up just having cake and coffee with my mother and my sister and it turned out to be a cozy and very relaxed birthed afternoon with a sugared up and crazy birthday boy.

Why the hell did I make my life so hard two days before. I left so many things to the last minute that I could have organised earlier and be less stressed. But I guess this is how I have to learn and next year I will prepare a present well in advance and get the ingredients for a cake not on the day I have to make the cake but maybe two-three days before.

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Lennon had fun, of that I am sure. We blew up lots of balloons and he loved it. He has a definite love for balloons and soccer balls. A real boy.

Today we had a relaxing day after the storm. Went for a child walk to the Hackischen Höfe and had some left-over cake and tea afterwards.

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And I realised that next year I will have to actually throw him a little party maybe with a friend or two, and I will have to be better prepared.
How come I think its such a big deal. Lennon’s birthday seems much bigger than my own or Papa Madola’s. Oh being a parent is strange sometimes.

*Hugs and Kisses*

Back again… new energy!


the last month has been crazy, my little man has started kindergarden and even though I thought I would be cool about it, I do miss him when I leave him for 15 min. Crazy how attached a mother is to her child. Oh well its crazy how I am attached to little Lennon, who isn’t so little any more after all.
He doesn’t visit the kindergarden the whole day, just for two hours and I am accompany him the whole time, but I sit in the background and let the kindergarden teacher handle everything. Then I leave for 15 min and go around the block once or twice to kill the time. Its weird to have the time/ peace to look at things in the shops, windows and be at a supermarket without having someone pull stuff out of the shelves from their pram. Hahahaha after 2 years of having my sunshine around, I can’t remember life before him. Thats great. So happy to have him and to also slowly find some new freedom.
Next week we will hopefully take the next step and I will leave him for a longer time so that he actually really accepts and realises that I can go and leave him with the other kids and that I also come back every time.

Otherwise Berlin has been rainy, grey, winter and pre-adventszeit. When I lived in Cape Town, I always missed this time. The time when it gets cold and rainy. I do kind of love putting the heaters on, lighting candles all over the rooms and baking christmas-biscuits. It makes my heart feel warm 🙂 I have made some double chocolate chip cookies so far and some peanut butter biscuits. Lennon loves them, so do I. Papa Madola isn’t such a biscuit fan. So Lennon and I get to eat them all…


What do you guys bake, pickle, cook during this time?
Its funny in Cape Town this feeling of having to bake, cook, pickle things, never overcame me. Must have been the warm weather and time at the Clifton Beach that kept me occupied enough to not think about it 🙂

Would love to hear what you guys are making this christmas-time.

*Hugs and Kisses*

Lennon and my iPhone


Just paged through a parenting magazine ‘Nido’ and saw that according to a study (KIM-Study 2012) two thirds of kids between six and thirteen years of age are interested and glued to a cellphone/ smartphone.
I was a little shocked but then reminded myself of my own little man Lennon. He isn’t even six yet and he is already asking to play with my iPhone.
I always wonder if we as parents should give in, to the ‘new-age’ way of playing, or should we be hard and make it clear from the beginning that we don’t want them playing games on the iPhone.

I grew up without any smartphones, iPads, we didn’t even have a computer or TV. When my siblings and I wanted to play, we went outside, played in the room with cars, dolls, or we sat around looking at pictures in books etc.
But I do remember, whenever I went to a friends house, where they had a TV or computer, I was literally glued to the ‘new’ entertainment. It wasn’t very social of me.

And now that I am a mother and have to make these decisions for my son, I always wonder what the good middle path is. A little here and a little there can’t be bad. But everything in moderation.


But I do find it very scary how my son can un-slides/unlocks my iPhone, slides the icons to the left to reach his one game that is on my phone. He taps it, hits play and plays the game. When he is done and had enough, he pushes the home button to return to the home screen and put’s the phone down.

I downloaded the game only for the really hard times, when he is screaming on the underground train, or when he won’t sit still at a doctor’s office etc. But maybe I should delete it and stop letting him play with it.

I have made it my mission to not be on the phone as much and I try really hard to leave the phone behind when I am on the move and busy with Lennon.
And I must say, I haven’t been on the phone as much and he doesn’t get reminded of the cellular device 🙂 The nagging for the phone has almost stopped. Great!
I most definitely miss it more than he does. Its kind of sick how we believe we can’t live without these things. How it’s such a habit to check my emails all the time, check facebook and who is doing what. I mean it really is mind boggling how we depend on these devices out of habit.

*Hugs and Kisses*

‘Nackidei’ is the new ‘Please’


This morning my dear son Lennon wanted some yogurt for breakfast.
He pointed at the yoghurt in the fridge and made it very clear that I should be moving faster to make it all happen.
I asked him to say ‘please’, as I am trying very hard to add some new words to his vocabulary, and he smiles at me and says: ‘nackidei’.
Its german for ‘ butt naked, or completely naked’. I had to laugh out aloud and he loved the reaction. He thought he was took funny and started to repeat it. I’ve noticed he says words and watches my or Papa Madola’s reaction and those words that get a laugh, he will repeat. The others he won’t repeat again. As you can imagine, we had a very happy and funny breakfast. Him eating his yoguhrt and us laughing at him saying funny words and trying to make us laugh even more.

In the last couple of days he has been adding little words to his vocabulary and I have been trying to add new ones with him. But he does in his own time and I am sure he’ll get there eventually.
Because of him growing up in an English/German language household, he mixes a lot. But he uses mostly english words. Besides the usual ‘Mama’, ‘Papa’, ‘Wau Wau’ and ‘Mooo’, he now also says: ‘Down’, ‘Water’, ‘Nackidei’, ‘More’, ‘Duck’, ‘Ball’ and ‘Daddy’ and ‘Dakke’, which is probably meant to be ‘Danke’, ‘Thank you’ in german.
As you can see its mostly english and on the one hand I cant wait for him to build sentences but on on the other hand I am not sure I want to have the ‘Why’ question coming all the time and discussions why he can or cant do something.
But I don’t have a choice and thats the way it is… Luckily due to the bilingual mess he is starting a little later than other kids.

*Hugs and Kisses*

Hipster Town Berlin, Germany


It looks like I am living in hipster central.
Everywhere around me I see plateau shoes, expensive hippy cloths and ombre hair do’s. What has happened? I feel underdressed all the time… do I have to also change my style, walk around like everyone else?
I don’t feel I have enough time to spend in the bathroom getting dressed and putting on make up. Maybe I should invest more time into it. I always promised myself and my husband that I would make an afford not to land up looking like a typical mom, with oily hair, food bits on my cloths and to never wear tents to hide any sort of unwanted fat roll.
But I think sometimes I might have become one of them. I really have to sort it out!!!

How do you moms out there keep up your style? How do you make sure you don’t turn into filthy mama monsters?

Today is friday and I feel like the week just passed me by. I have cleaned the apartment, made bread, did some laundry and the apartment still looks like a tornado it it. Lennon is just running around pulling things down and opening the freezer to look inside. Why does he have to do that? no one knows. I wish sometimes I could look into his head and see what he is thinking. I’m not going to keep worrying about the mess. Im gonna go to the shops to get toiletpaper and then ply with him. I don’t care anymore if the house looks like sh**t.
Its more important that Lennon also gets some quality time. Right?


Happy Friday everyone.

*Hugs and Kisses*

My Passion: Baking


One of my passions is definitely: ‘baking’. I would love to bake something everyday but don’t have anyone to eat all the goodies. Therefore I only get to bake for special occasions or when I feel really bored I just bake and hope it will be eaten by my son and husband.
Last week I made a Lemon Meringue Tart and I thought it turned out quite nicely. The meringue was perfect. But we only ate half the tart and the rest was left to stay in the fridge until I decided it was time to part ways with the tart and discarded the rest. It was a sad ‘Good Bye’. I should really make more friends and have people over when one of my ‘baking attacks’ hits me. 🙂 Anyone interested? 🙂 Hahahahahaaha…

Was noch… Today is Thursday and I am going to leave the house today. Otherwise i’m gonna get crazy. Yesterday I just hang out with Lennon at home and today is ‘showing the world my face again’ day!!!

Besides that, Lennon really needs Nappies desperately. Good excuse to leave the flat, down those 95 stairs and into the Berlin sun. I mean who am I to complain about that. Right? Really, what the hell am I talking about and complaining about. The weather is beautiful and fresh air is also a good idea…
Let’s get outside already!

This morning I hung up some hangers for Lennon and his cloths. I love it when the household, including his room, is tidy and organised. So I hung up some hangers for us to hang up his cloths at night or what ever can be hung up and not lie around on the floor.


And I hung up a drawing, made by Lennon, in his room. It looks lovely and who would have thought that I can do that still. I Haven’t done that in years and this morning I decided it was about time. Selbst ist die Frau, richtig?!

*Hugs and Kisses*